Chapter 7 - The Things He Believed
I had thought the worst thing I would hear that night was the word locked.
I was wrong.
“No,” I said. “I never wanted Mommy gone.”
Noah studied me with swollen eyes.
“Claire said you picked a new one.”
Rachel looked away.
“No one replaces your mommy,” I told him. “Nobody.”
“Then why did you marry her?”
There was no answer that could make me innocent.
“I thought she would be kind to you,” I said. “I was wrong.”
He pressed Bear against his chest.
“Were you wrong about me?”
The room went silent.
“What do you mean?”
“She said I make you sad.”
I moved closer without touching him.
“Being your dad is the best thing in my life.”
“But I cry.”
“You’re allowed.”
“And I talk about Mommy.”
“So do I.”
His eyes searched mine, looking for the hidden condition.
I had heard enough to know there were more things he needed to say. I also knew I couldn’t turn his pain into an interrogation.
“We don’t have to talk anymore tonight,” I said. “You can tell me things whenever you want.”
“Will you remember?”
“I’ll remember.”
I slept on the floor beside the guest bed.
Every time Noah woke, his hand reached over the edge.
Every time, I took it.
At dawn, Rachel found me in her kitchen writing down his exact words.
“You should eat.”
“I should have seen it.”
“Yes,” she said quietly.
I looked up.
She didn’t soften the truth.
“Daniel, you missed things. You need to face that. But he needs you awake and useful now.”
I nodded.
My phone held thirty-seven missed calls.
Claire. Vivian. People from the wedding.
Then a message arrived from an unfamiliar number.
My name is Maya. I babysat Noah in March. Claire told me you didn’t want me back.
I called immediately.
Maya answered with a trembling hello.
“What happened in March?” I asked.
“I told her she couldn’t speak to him that way.”
I gripped the edge of the counter.
“What did she say?”
May you like
Maya began to cry.
“She told him his mother was dead and he needed to get over it.”
