Chapter 11 - THE BODY KEEPS SCORE
Daniel arrived at the emergency room with a fever.
His kidney function numbers were rising.
Dr. Harris was furious.
“You know better.”
“I forgot.”
“You don’t forget transplant medication.”
“I had other things going on.”
The doctor stared at him.
“Your kidney doesn’t care about your divorce.”
Daniel looked away.
“We caught it early,” Dr. Harris said. “But you keep doing this and you could lose the graft.”
Those words terrified him more than death had.
Lose the kidney.
Lose Claire’s house.
Lose her retirement.
Lose everything she had sacrificed because he was careless.
Daniel whispered, “Fix it.”
“We’re trying.”
For the next forty-eight hours, Daniel lay in a hospital bed receiving treatment.
Vanessa called once.
He didn’t answer.
Claire didn’t know he was there.
At least, he thought she didn’t.
On the second night, Daniel woke and saw someone sitting beside the bed.
For one impossible second, he thought it was Claire.
Then the person leaned forward.
Rachel.
“You look terrible.”
Daniel smiled weakly.
“Good to see you too.”
She held up his phone charger.
“You left this at Claire’s restaurant.”
Daniel nodded.
“Thanks.”
Rachel didn’t leave.
Daniel looked at her.
“You hate me.”
“Yes.”
“Fair.”
“Don’t make it charming.”
“I’m too tired.”
She studied him.
“Claire knows you’re here.”
Daniel’s heart jumped.
“Did she—”
“No.”
He looked away.
“She asked if you were stable.”
“That’s it?”
Rachel’s eyes narrowed.
“That’s more than you deserve.”
“I know.”
She stood.
Daniel whispered, “Why did she do it?”
Rachel stopped.
“For the hundredth time, because she loved you.”
“No. I mean why didn’t she tell me after I left?”
Rachel turned around.
Daniel’s eyes were wet.
“She could’ve destroyed me.”
“Yes.”
“She could’ve told Vanessa. My friends. My family.”
“Yes.”
“Why didn’t she?”
Rachel stared at him for a long time.
Then she walked back to the bed.
“Because Claire doesn’t want your shame.”
Daniel said nothing.
“She wanted your love.”
Rachel’s voice softened.
“When she realized she couldn’t have that, she chose nothing.”
Daniel shut his eyes.
Rachel walked away.
At the door, she stopped.
“One more thing.”
Daniel opened his eyes.
“She’s leaving.”
His heart skipped.
“Leaving where?”
“Oregon.”
“When?”
“Next week.”
“Why?”
“Job offer. Fresh start.”
Daniel pushed himself up.
“No.”
Rachel’s expression hardened.
“Don’t.”
“I have to see her.”
“You already did.”
“I have to say goodbye.”
Rachel stared at him.
Daniel said, “I’m not asking her to come back.”
“Then what are you asking?”
He looked down at the scar beneath his hospital gown.
“I need her to know I’m going to do something with this life.”
Rachel’s face softened by half an inch.
“That sounds like your problem, not hers.”
She left.
Daniel lay awake until morning.
At 6:13 a.m., Dr. Harris entered with the newest blood results.
Daniel sat up.
“Well?”
The doctor looked at him.
“The kidney is responding.”
Daniel exhaled.
“Thank God.”
“But there’s something else.”
Daniel’s stomach tightened.
“What?”
Dr. Harris held up an envelope.
“Claire left this with me before your surgery.”
Daniel stared at it.
The handwriting on the front was unmistakable.
His name.
May you like
And beneath it:
ONLY IF HE DOESN’T MAKE IT.
